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Archive for May 2008

May 30th, 2008

MSNBC Headline: ‘Consumers Being Squeezed From Two Sides’

Lucky Consumer In Midst of Economic Menage-a-Trois with Sexy Rising Gas Prices and Hot Friend Falling Home Equity
Dear Penthouse Forum,
You might not believe this — I could hardly believe it myself — but every word of this story is true.
I’ve known Gas Prices since we went to high school together.  She was always a bit […]

By markjabo -- 1 comment

May 28th, 2008

America Runs On Manufactured Hysteria

Rachel Ray’s Scarf Criticized By Conservatives as ‘Promoting Terrorism,’ Michelle Malkin Calls For Hermes Factory to Be Put On Terrorist Watch List
In yet another skirmish on the War on Terror, Michelle Malkin and other conservative bloggers have taken Rachel Ray and Dunkin’ Donuts to task for allowing the perky spokesperson to appear in an ad […]

By markjabo -- 2 comments

May 28th, 2008

Scrolling Headlines Don’t Scroll Unless You Do — May 28, 2008

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America Runs On Manufactured Hysteria
Rachel Ray Accused of Promoting Terrorism By Wearing Scarf; Hermes Headquarters Shut Down In Search For Weapons of Mass Fashion
“I can barely cook, let alone make an IED…”
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MSNBC Article Details The Top 10 Cars Teens Want
Savvy Teens Said to Favor Cars With High Gas Mileage, Good Safety Ratings and Ones […]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 28th, 2008

Former White House Spokesman Writes Tell-All Book

Professional Sycophant Says Jobs In Private Sector For Gullible Ass-Kissers Surprisingly Scarce
There’s a very good chance you’ll never want to see Scott McClellan again by the end of this week as the former White House press secretary shills his book, “What Happened: Inside the Bush White House and Washington’s Culture of Deception,” on the TV […]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 27th, 2008

Mortgage Lenders Association Chooses Theme Song

Says Culture Club Hit Captures Spirit of Housing Market, Reflects Fact Housing Prices Are Headed Back to 1982 Levels
Home prices fell at the fastest rate in two decades last month as the Standard & Poor’s/Case-Shiller national home price index fell 14.1 percent in the first quarter to its lowest level since the index began in […]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 27th, 2008

Bringing Sexy Back: Victoria’s Secret In Trademark Dispute

Competing Shampoo Company Sues Over Use of Word ‘Sexy’ — Next Up: Suit Over Right to Use of Phrase ‘Yeast Infection’
Lingerie company Victoria’s Secret is appealing the decision of a trademark board which ruled that the lingerie maker’s brand of So Sexy shampoos could cause consumers to confuse the lingerie giant’s products with those of […]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 27th, 2008

Sharon Stone Calls China Earthquake ‘Karma’ For Persecution of Tibetans

Actress Still Not Sure What Iowans Are Being Punished For
Flashing an IQ nearly as low as the camera angle in Basic Instinct, Sharon Stone speculated that the recent earthquakes in China might be “karma” for the country’s persecution of its Tibetan minority.
The actress said she wasn’t sure why tornadoes struck Iowa this weekend but speculated […]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 24th, 2008

*shaking head*

“What?”

From the New York Daily News.

And Keith Olbermann’s scathing commentary.
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Note to Hillary: The whole point of waiting for someone else to meltdown is not to meltdown yourself in the meantime…
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Photo
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Share This

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 23rd, 2008

Whoa. Tainted Grub.

Contaminated Pet Food Companies Settle —
My Dog Still Holds A Grudge, Pens Song Parody of Soft Cell Hit
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Sometimes I feel I’ve got to
Run away I’ve got to
Get away
From the cut-rate food that you make me eat
The love we share
Seems to go nowhere
And I’ve lost my light
For I toss my cookies day and night
 
(chorus) […]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 22nd, 2008

Bush Signs Genetic Discrimination Law

Insurance Companies Can’t Base Charges On Likelihood of Debilitating Illness, Move Expected to Ease Passage of Bill Ending Bank Discrimination Against People With Guns
Showing his usual grasp of nuance and subtlety, George Bush signed into law today a bill that prohibits insurance companies from setting rates based on genetic testing.
The bill means insurance companies can […]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

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