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Archive for May 2008

May 22nd, 2008

Hillary Compares Efforts To Count FL and MI Votes To Fight To End Slavery

Says Her Role As Democratic Underdog Much Like Jews In Holocaust, Points Out Similarities of Her Pregnancy with Chelsea to Immaculate Conception of Mary
Hillary Clinton continued her divisive push for the Democratic nomination by continuing to press for the primary results from Michigan and Florida to be counted for her.
The delusional Senator from New York [...]

By markjabo -- 1 comment

May 22nd, 2008

American Airlines To Charge $15 For First Checked Bag

Airline Looks To Limit Customer Backlash By Announcing It Will Also Charge $275 for First Screaming Kid
American Airlines announced that it will begin charging $15 for the first checked bag on all of its flights. Consumer groups, initially outraged at the charge, were mollified when the airline announced it would also institute a $275 [...]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 21st, 2008

McCain To Interview Florida Governor Charlie Crist For Possible VP Slot

Arizona Senator Hopes Crist Will Help Solidify ‘Just For Men’ Voter Bloc, Distract Melanoma Concerns
Republican nominee John McCain will interview prospective vice-presidential candidates this weekend at his home in Arizona. Cindy McCain is expected to provide the beer, saving the campaign some much needed funds.
McCain’s strategy in tapping Crist appears to be two-fold. [...]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 21st, 2008

Wearing Of Flag Pins On Lapels Fuels Political Debate

Many Question Whether Anyone In Media Would Know A Real Issue If It Bit Them In The O’Reilly
As the political season drags on, candidates continue to face questions about whether they can be considered patriotic if they don’t wear a flag pin on their lapel.
Questions have also been raised about whether reporters can be considered [...]

By markjabo -- 1 comment

May 21st, 2008

Clinton, Ferraro Damage Women’s Rights

Continued Emphasis on Bizarre Election Scenarios Fuels Stereotypes of Women As Bad At Math
Hillary Clinton today continued to push the story she had a lead in the popular vote count in the race for the Democratic nomination “if we count people we said we wouldn’t count and assume that every hillbilly in the country votes [...]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 19th, 2008

14 Tons Of Oreo Cookies Spilled In Truck Accident

President Bush Declares Illinois Highway A Disaster Area, FEMA Rushes Milk Trucks to Scene
The White House was in crisis management mode today as news of a truck accident in Illinois, in which 14 tons of Oreo cookies spilled out on to the highway, rocked the nation.
The iconic double-stuffed cookies strained local resources as Illinois residents [...]

By markjabo -- 2 comments

May 18th, 2008

Scrolling Headlines Don’t Scroll Unless You Do — May 18, 2008

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Huckabee Discusses Role As Potential Republican Running Mate
McCain Camp Looks to Divert Focus On Candidate’s Age With Bat-Shit Crazy Veep Choice
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Ted Kennedy In Hospital With Seizure
Dems Express Concern, Say Seizure is Related to Global Warming
Surprised that health care system is actually working
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Bush Tells Middle Eastern Countries They Should Pursue Democracy
Middle Eastern Countries [...]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 15th, 2008

Scrolling Headlines Don’t Scroll Unless You Do — May 15, 2008

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Angelina Jolie: ‘I Love Being Pregnant’
Police Called In to Control Thousands of Male Volunteers Outside Star’s Hollywood Mansion
Brad Pitt: ‘It doesn’t suck to be me…’
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McCain Says Iraq War Can Be Won In Four Years
Republican Nominee Also Says He Can Win Gold Medal At This Year’s Olympics, Has Pill That Can Add Inches [...]

By markjabo -- 1 comment

May 13th, 2008

SPECIAL REPORT: John McCain Update

There’s a very funny site that has a growing list of Things Younger Than John McCain.
At last check this included Spam (the food), Mount Rushmore, both of Barack Obama’s parents and the state of Alaska.
Holy carbon dating, Batman!  Mount freakin’ Rushmore?!
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Quien es mas young-o? McCain y [...]

By markjabo -- 0 comments

May 12th, 2008

McCain Looks To Attract Younger Voters

Republican Candidate Says He’s Not Willing to Concede Voters In Their Late Sixties To Obama
Republican candidate John McCain took a combative stance on the campaign trail, saying he will actively look to court younger voters.   McCain indicated he would be targeting voters as young as 55 by letting them know he was one of the [...]

By markjabo -- 0 comments