Bin Laden Issues Threats Against Cartoons
Doonesbury, Cathy Put On Orange Alert
In his first recorded message this year, Osama bin Laden took time out from his usual blather to address the issue of cartoons that did not conform to Islamic law.
The al-Qaeda leader had harsh words for the Danish cartoonist who drew a picture of the prophet Muhammad with a bomb in his turban but also criticized Gary Larsen’s Far Side for showing pigs that could talk and Cathy Guisewite’s Cathy for portraying women without veils and genital mutilation.
The 6 foot 5 inch radical Islamic small forward (who critics say has lost a step and can no longer consistently hit the three-pointer) reserved special vitriol for Prince Valiant, saying a comic strip featuring a crusading Nordic prince is particularly offensive to Muslims.
While acknowledging the comic strip’s lush illustration technique, bin Laden nonetheless criticized Prince Valiant for having a Western bias and tired plot lines.
“It is hard to believe that Prince Valiant takes 14 weeks to land on a beach and then another three months to get to the hidden castle,” said bin Laden who complained he once went for two-years without seeing a Sunday paper and only to find the strip was still on the same story when he finally did pick up a copy at his local news stand.
“And they hadn’t even gotten to a battle scene, yet,” grumbled the radical leader.
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“One time I kind of chuckled at ‘Marmaduke’…”
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