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Scrolling Headlines Don’t Scroll Unless You Do - March17, 2008

by markjabo on March 17th, 2008

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Pontiac Attempts to Revive High-Performance Car Category
Automaker Will Also Spearhead Effort to Bring Back Mullets

dreamstime_254794.jpg  GM to sponsor commercial-free ‘Joe Dirt’ showing on TBS

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‘Dancing With The Stars’ Market Hits New High
Heather Mills $48.6 Million Divorce Settlement Raises Bar for D-List Celebrities

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Fed Cuts Key Lending Rate On Sunday
Church Officials Announce Cut During Sunday Sermons, No One on Wall Street Finds Out ‘Til Monday

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Bush Praises ‘Strong, Decisive’ Fed Action
Says Government is ‘On Top of the Situation … Like a Fat Guy Passed Out On a Hooker’

2-george_w_bush_on_screen.jpg “Wait, … what?”

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Treasury Secretary Admits Feds Considered Drastic Move of Postponing NCAA Basketball Tournament
Concerned That Employees Bitching About Alma Maters Being Snubbed, Making Selections Would Be Major Blow to Economic Productivity

2-basketball_stadium.jpg Winning Final Four pool better than tax refund

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