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Too Much Junk In The Trunk

by markjabo on July 11th, 2008

Fannie Said To Be ‘Too Big To Fail’; Freddie Would Also Get Bailed Out to Prevent Gender Discrimination Suit

John McCain and Charles Schumer have both gone on record as saying the government has succeeded beyond its wildest dreams by running a mortgage guarantor into the ground and then determining that they screwed up so badly the only solution left is to throw more money into the world’s biggest paper shredder.

In other news, 50 Cent has released a new version of his Shake That Ass rap, featuring Charles “Chucky” Schumer:

Lil’ mortgage, show me how you move it,
Go ahead put ya bucks into it,
Do ya thang like there aint nothin to it,
Shake… shake… shake that ass girl. {2x}

Go, Go, 50 billion in the House - bounce checks, y’all already know what I’m about.
The flow sounds sicker, gonna tax you, sucker,
I ain’t stupid - see votes and know dope moves come quicker.
Whoa!
Fannie’s hips is hypnotic, accounting so erratic, but watch -
I’m like bounce that assss girl.
I get it crunk in here, make interest rates jump in here, front in here,
we’ll thump in here. Oooohh.

I’m so gutter, so crooked, so hood.
So gully, so grimey, what’s good?
Outside, the States on skids-
I’m in the club wit the rich kids - don’t start nothin’, it won’t be
nothin’. Uuuhhh.

Lil’ mortgage show me how you move it,
Go ahead put ya bucks into it,
Do ya thang like there aint nothin to it,
Shake.. shake.. shake that ass girl. {2x}

Let’s party, everybody stand up.
Taxpayers put ya hands up.
Its a hold-up, Congressmen bounce wit me.
Sip champagne and burn a little greenery.
This hot.
It’s a big bailout, let’s go.
You now gettin’ fleeced by a pro.
I get toed to flip dough to get more, fo sho’.
Get my pockets lined on the Senate floor.
Look homie I don’t dance all i do is this.
It’s the same 2-step wit a lil’ twist.
Tax ‘n spend. I ain’t new to this, I’m true to this.
Pay attention boy, I teach how to do this shit.
You mix a lil’ Crisis with the hype going on.
And a lil’ spending spree, you know we ‘finna carry on.
Hollerin’ at a regular guy tryin’ to do things right,
we gonna be up in that bitch ’til we break daylight.

(1, 2, 3 Let’s go)

Lil’ mortgage show me how you move it,
Go ahead put ya bucks into it,
Do ya thang like there aint nothin to it,
Shake.. shake.. shake that ass girl. {2x}

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